Memory.. Little threads that hold life's patches of meaning together. ~ Mark Twain

Sunday, February 13, 2005

Wedding Proposals

Inspector posed this question to everyone during dinner after our yearly 'Ops Angpow' - 'Are engagement rings and proposals necessary?' How am I supposed to answer that, right?

Which girl wouldn't dream of being proposed and have an engagement ring around their finger? Blame it on the Western culture (on TV, novels and magazines) if you want to. We grew up dreaming that our knights in shining armour would go down on bended knee, holding a diamond ring, asking us "Will you marry me?". Then the wedding would take place in a church or at a lovely garden, we would walk down the aisle and say "I will". Just like every other girl, I had dreams like that. Had, in the sense that there is no way I'll be walking down the church aisle since Inspector nor I are Christians. And he did not really propose. It was more of like a mutual discussion about going for my long service award trip as a married couple and that was it. I don't consider it as a proposal really. Therefore, no engagement ring whatsoever.

Back to the question, the girls argued that proposals are indeed necessary as a symbol of commitment that she's the one. It's like how when people normally date around, a guy would ask "Will you be my girlfriend?" and if she accepts, then it's official that they're a couple. The concept applies here too. Asking the girl to marry him, means that he has decided that she's the one he wants to spend his entire lifetime with, to grow old with. The engagement ring is like a proof that they have decided to get married. The guyz, on the other hand, argued that engagement rings are just a waste of $$. If they have the $$, then they'll get it. Otherwise, it's gonna be only the wedding rings.

Somehow, I felt more upset after he posed the question. If he had asked his friends without my presence, I would be ok about it. But now that he asked with me being there, and should he ever go down on bended knee, it would make me feel like as if he was obliged to do that. I won't like that kind of feeling..

Later that night, he asked me "Do you want an engagement ring? I don't think it's necessary lor". I just shrugged. What else do you want me to say?


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